Cornflakes at 3 AM
by I feel blah
Summary: Repost. Grimmjow was bored & he dragged Ulquiora along to Karakura Town to torment Ichigo, who was on vacation with his family. They left Keigo to house sit. Grimm is disappointed but soon decides to raid the kitchen. Ulqui decides he likes Keigo.


Tite Kubo is the creator and owner of the series Bleach

I do not own any of it, neither the characters, nor the manga or the anime.

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><p>{OOC Grimmjow and Ulquiora One shot}<p>

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><p>Cornflakes at 3 AM<p>

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><p>Grimmjow was bored, so he dragged Ulquiora along to Karakura Town to torment Ichigo, but he and his family were on vacation. They left Keigo to house sit for them. Grimm is disappointed but soon decides to raid the kitchen. Ulquiora decides that he likes the brunette teenager, a lot.<p>

"...Shh," Grimmjow shushed the always quiet Ulquiora. Ulquiora rolled his eyes [internally].

"This is gonna be great! I can't wait to get that brat shinigami!" Grimmjow said loudly earning a strange look from his stoic companion.

"Why am I coming along?" Ulquiora asked in a bored voice.

"You could use the exercise, look at those flabby arms and that gut," Grimm laughed and patted the smaller man's 'gut.' Ulquiora examined his person he was as lithe as ever. Grim hissed at the placid arrancar. "Just shut the hell up and let's go before anyone notices!"

Ulquiora didn't bat an eye. He opened the gargantua leading hopefully to where ever Ichigo Kurosaki currently was located, if for no other reason than to get some peace for five minutes. Grimm flashed his razor sharp smile and stepped through the maw.

Ulquiora thought of closing up the portal and saidoning back to his room, but decided he better go keep an eye on the idiot. He stepped out into a clean kitchen, with white tile floors and a bowl of fruit sitting on a small table in the center of the room. The clock on the microwave flashed 2:59 am.

"Exactly when did you decide to make it your mission in life to annoy me," Ulquiora said with no hint of frustration or annoyance, thought he truly has been feeling it.

"Actually I decided you aren't so bad, and my actual mission is to kill the strawberry. But I think a good side mission is pulling that stick out of your ass. I have noticed you talk a lot more since I started working on ya," Grimmjow was unusually jovial, but then he frowned, "Are you sure we're in the right place?" Ulquiora nodded, "Then where the hell is he! I don't feel him. I only feel some weakling!"

As if on cue Keigo walked down in boxers and a t-shirt half asleep and only in search of a glass of water. [Why he didn't sense the two very powerful, very not human creatures escapes even me.]

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><p>Keigo's eyes snapped open suddenly, "What the..." His words were cut off by a clawed hand crushing his windpipe.<p>

"Listen up kid, I wanna know where Kurosaki is, you got it," Keigo shook his ever bluing face. Grimmjow let go of him. Keigo gasped for breath. He would have run but realized that would only get him killed faster.

"T-they're...on...vacation...I-I'm...just...house...sitting," Keigo panted out.

"Well FUCK!" Grimmjow punched the wall next Keigo's head. The boy slid to the floor hoping to be forgotten. Grimm then he turned to the kitchen counter, "Hey! Is that a box of corn flakes?" Grimmjow made himself at home he grabbing a large mixing bowl out of the kitchen cupboard. He emptied the box into it. Then he opened the fridge. He took the rest of the half & half, and an entire gallon of milk. He poured them in his bowl found a spoon and went off to find the television. Keigo heard the electric ping of the set warming up (the Kurosaki family is overdue for an upgrade on their TV). He heard some late night infomercial. Then he looked at the green eyed one. To his great displeasure that one was watching him. "Um, OK, I'm going back to bed, you guys lock up or, whatever, Keigo picked himself up off the floor. He tried to slide past the pale creature, but Ulquiora blocked his path.

"Hello trash," there is almost a smile on his face. The arrancar reached out and grabbed the boy's wrist.

Grimmjow ignored the loud screaming and the crash. He just turned up the volume of the TV. He turned to 'The Soap Network' and watched old reruns of 'General Hospital'

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><p>...Two weeks later. Isshin, Karin, Yuzu, and Ichigo came home from their relaxing Hawaiian cruise only to find their house completely trashed, and reeking of cat urine. The plants Keigo was supposed to water were withered and brown. The sink was loaded with dirty dishes. There was a note on the fridge stuck under a fruit magnet [it was a banana if you must know].<p>

"Hey Ich- there's a note here," Karin handed it over to her brother.

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><p>Dear Strawberry,<p>

Ulquiora and I stopped by to visit, but you and your fucking family were on vacation. Hope you don't mind we made ourselves at home. I watered your plants for you, *snickers*

"Wait did he actually write 'snickers.' ...I'm guessing that explains the

Smell," Ichigo complained. He went back to the note.

Oh, sorry about your little friend. I'm afraid Ulquiora took quite a shine to him. I tried to get him to let go, he just kept screaming, 'Mine!' 'Hands off!' and stuff like that. I think he finally got that stick out of his butt. I bet you don't want to know where he put it!

Your little friend didn't seem to well last time I checked on him, but Ulquie wanted to bring him back with us to Los Noches. Well I guess I'll have to come back and kill you some other time. Thanks for the cornflakes.

Love,

Grimmjow Jeagerjaques :)

[Yes Grimm drew a smiley face]

P.S. You're out of milk.

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><p>{I know this is way out of character for the pairing, but it was 3 am and I was bored}<p> 


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